Self-awareness is not just a solo activity: you need input from others around you. Of course, your thought-stream is most likely telling you: “You don’t need any information from anybody else! You can totally handle this on your own!” That’s why we love the thought-stream: it’s always very confident.

Remember that your brain is locked away inside the hollow bowling ball that is your cranium, with precious little input from the outside world. That doesn’t stop the brain from creating credible and comprehensive explanations for everything. But it’s impossible that the stories you tell yourself about yourself will be completely accurate.

Of course, the stories about you that you hear from others have plenty of holes as well. But the holes on those stories are in different places than the holes in your stories, and so there might be some good information there. Maybe what they see is not accurate. But if even 10% of what they have to say to you gives you new insights and perspectives, that’s information you can really use.

Try It: Ask for ten minutes of feedback from a friend, family member, or co-worker by asking them “What do you know about me that you don’t think I know about myself?”. Listen for the 10% of what they say that you really need to hear: just one minute of useful, accurate, insight that builds your self-understanding. You might discard the rest—but take that one minute seriously: it’s going to make you a more self-aware person.

Image source: https://pixabay.com/en/ten-percent-statistics-money-1173244/